Rita Ora has officially been announced as the new host of America's Next Top Model. The show was picked up by VH1. There's no official start date for the reality show, but this isn't Rita Ora's first time as a judge. She's hosted on both The Voice and The X-Factor in the United Kingdom. Fashion fans shouldn't be in total fear. Tyra Banks promises that she'll be dropping in throughout the cycle. Rita Ora may be out of her professional depth critiquing models on their runway look but Tyra is sure to bolster the panel with seasoned professionals that will help Ora make the right call. All she needs to do is keep her face powdered and her comments bitchy but relateable. |
Rita Ora is still working on her second album after problems with Jay Z's record label Roc Nation and has yet to break through commercially in the United States, except for her guest spot on Iggy Azalea's “Black Widow”. We'll see if her lead role on ANTM will be her pop culture breakthrough. It certainly wasn't her spin in 50 Shades of Grey or ripping Zac Efron's shirt off on national television. We'll be watching. It should be noted that Rita's American breakthrough was stilted after former boyfriend Calvin Harris refused to let her perform “I Will Never Let You Down” on national televison. A song he wrote and produced for the singer. Petty.
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Waffles are the brutally shaped version of the pancake. The pancake is slim and circular, sometimes shaped. It must be torture being molded and shaped into the perfect waffle. Just like the American education system or the children of evangelical pastors. In other news I wonder why we don't hear more about waffle rebellion.
Waffle Houses are the center of all drama and all prostitutes in America. Country singer, Brandy Clark recently sang, “we don't have have Waffle House, but we always have something to talk about.” Bitch what are you talking about.
This is just a PSA from your friendly neighborhood blogger to love the waffle like it is your child. Although most of us have pancakes (sometimes known as flapjack), you should not discriminate against the waffle just because it's look different from other breakfast foods. Waffles have feelings too. RECIPES:
Wheat Bran Waffles 1 ½ cups of Flour ½ cup of Wheat Bran 1 teaspoon of Salt 2 Eggs 4 tablespoons of Butter 1 ¾ cups of Buttermilk ¼ cup of Honey Prepare and heat waffle iron. Whisk together the flour, wheat bran, salt, and baking soda in bowl. In a seperate bowl whisk together egg yolks, butter, honey, and buttermilk. Beat the egg whites with an electric mixer until still peaks form. Make a well in the center of dry ingredients, pour the buttermilk mixture into well, and whisk gently until the mixture is just incorporated. Fold the whipped egg whites into the batter. Spread the appropriate amount of batter onto the waffle iron and cook until golden brown. Waffles Benedict 2 cups of All Purpose Baking Mix 1 1/3 cup of Buttermilk ½ cup of Parmesan Cheese 2 tablespoons of Vegetable Oil 5 Large Eggs ½ teaspoon of White Vinegar 0.9 ounce envelope of Hollondaise Sauce Mix 1 tablespoon of Lemon Juice ¼ teaspoon of Dried Tarragon 8 slices of Prosciutto Stir together baking mix, next 3 ingredients, and 1 egg into a bowl until well blended. Let stand for 5 minutes. Meanwhile, add water to a depth of 3 inches in a large saucepan. Bring to a boil, reduce heat, and maintain a light simmer. Add vinegar. Break remaining 4 eggs, and slip into water, 1 at a time, as close as possible to surface. Simmer 3 to 5 minutes or to desired degree of doneness. Remove with a slotted spoon. Trim edges if desired. Cook batter in a preheated, lightly greased waffle iron until golden. Prepare the hollandaise sauce according to package directions, adding lemon juice and tarragon. Stack 2 waffles, and top with 2 prosciutto slices, 1 poached egg, and desired amount of hollandaise sauce.
Forewarning now, this Tasty Tuesday does not attempt to teach you how to make your own cereal, but instead incorporate cereal into your daily life. And, yes this basic bitch included a recipe for rice krispy treats. Recently, I read about Baby Boomers judging us, the youngins, for not eating cereal for breakfast. We're essentially pisssing on American culture, by going to Starbucks and getting that delicious outmeal with all the dried fruit and brown sugar in the morning. Like, I'm sorry Susie, but isn't it time to put in your catheter?
I have a very boring taste in cereal. It's all very simple, I have dentures kind of food. I love me some Grape Nuts, like the grandma I am. Clearly I'm down with the Life. And, I have been known to enjoy some Corn Flakes in my spare time.
If I'm going for sweet cereal I do like my Lucky Charms. I feel a draw to them. My father's ancestry runs Irish and I feel connected to my people that way. Also a fun fact about cereal is that the first cereal was created by a vegetarian (not a vegan thank god). It happened in 1863 by a man named James Caleb Jackson. Apparently her ran a sanitorium. Isn't that just a great hearty fact to convince you that cereal is made for you. #NeverTrump
Corn Flake Crusted Chicken 4 Chicken Breasts 3 cups of Corn Flakes 2 tablespoons of Butter 1 Egg 1 teaspoon of Water Salt Pepper Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Combine, salt and pepper. Covering the chicken breasts on front and back Mix egg and water in a bowl. Crush cornflakes and mix in butter. Dip chicken breasts into egg and water mixture and roll in the cornflake crust to coat. Bake for 30 minutes or until done. Rice Krispy Treats
¼ cup of Butter 4 cups of Marshmallows 5 cups of Rice Krispies Melt butter in large sauce pan over low heat. Add marshmallows and stir until melted and well blended. Cook 2 minutes longer, stirring constantly. Remove from heat. Add cereal. Stir until well coated.
There are so many ways to drink coffee. You can make instant. Buy some Dunkin Donuts blend. Grind up your own beans you bought at the farmer's market. You can make coffee through a cold drip, which only takes a few hours. And who doesn't have that kind of time? My point is that coffee is a versatile wonder of the natural world.
The long and short is that Starbucks is my shit. Once I drove a 100 miles through the heartland of America without seeing a single Starbucks. I now know what hell is like.
And, the best part of coffee is not only can you drink it, but it can also be mixed into your normal every day cooking. Hopefully, these recipes capture that magic.
RECIPES:
Cinnamon Laced Coffee Cake ½ cup of chopped Pecans 2 cups and 2 tablespoons of Sugar 1 teaspoon of Cinnamon 1 cup of Butter 2 Eggs 2 cups of Flour 1 teaspoon of Baking Powder 1/8 teaspoon of Salt 1 teaspoon of Vanilla 8 ounces of Sour Cream Preheat oven to 350 degreees. Lightly grease and flour a 10 x 4 inch tube pan. Combine pecans, 2 tablespoons of sugar, and cinnamon. Cream butter in a large mixer bowl. Add remaining 2 cups of sugar and beat at medium speed until well blended. Beat in eggs one at a time. Sift together flour, baking powder, and salt. Add gradually to butter mixture, mixing well until blended. Stir in vanilla. Fold in sour cream. Transfer half of batter to pan and spread evenly. Sprinkle half of pecan mixture over batter. Transfer remaining batter to pan and top with remaining pecan mixture. Bake for 55 to 65 minutes or until a tester inserted in center comes out clean. Col in pan. Invert onto a cake plate to serve.
Coffee Lovers
¾ cup of Sugar 1 ½ cups of Milk 1 ½ cups of cold Coffee 1 teaspoon of Vanilla 2 cups of Whipped Cream Combine sugar and milk in a large saucepan over medium heat. Bring to a boil and stir until sugar is dissolved. Remove from heat. Allow to cool. Add coffee, vanilla, and 1 cup of the whipping cream to milk mixture, stirring until well blended. Pour mixture into a loaf pan. Freeze until slushy. 1 to 2 hours. Just before serving, beat remaining cup of whipping cream until stiff peaks begin to form. Stir slush mixture, spoon it into dessert dishes, and top with a dollop of whipped cream.
Rachael Roy and her obscurity seem to be the most likely bet for “Becky with the good hair”, especially with her questionable instagram captions. Although, Jay-Z protege Rita Ora has been side eyed. She's gorgeous and she has good hair. But, I digress.
I don't think that Rachael should be too upset over this Rachel Roy mix up. It's good for business. People are laughing. Having a good time and if your going to be publicly harassed it might as well be on the grounds that you have “good hair.”
I wish Rachael Ray all the best. I won't be watching, but all those nice nursing homes and houses on the outskirts of LA county have to have something to watch and I support that.
Honey Vanilla Lemonade
2 cups of Sugar 1/2 cup of Honey 2 cups of Water 1 Vanilla Bean 2 1/2 cups of fresh Lemon Juice In a large saucepan, combine the sugar, honey and two cups water and place over medium-high heat. Cut the vanilla bean in half lengthwise, then, using the back of the knife, scrape the vanilla seeds from the pod and add to the saucepan, along with the pod. Bring the mixture to a boil and cook for 4-5 minutes, until the sugar is dissolved and the mixture thickens. Remove from the heat and allow to cool. Put the lemon juice into a gallon jug or pitcher. Pour the sugar syrup through a strainer into the pitcher and discard the pod. Add water to equal one gallon and stir well. Serve over ice
Ginger Lemonade
2 cups of Sugar 2 cups of Water 2 cups of fresh Lemon Juice 1/4 cup of thinly slice Ginger Combined the sugar, water and ginger in a small pot and bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Let the sugar dissolve but not caramelize. While the sugar water comes up to a boil, squeeze the lemons into a pitcher, discarding the seeds and rind. Add ice to the lemon juice until it comes about halfway up the sides of the pitcher. Strain the ginger-infused sugar syrup into the lemon juice then top it off with some water.
It's not that I try not to eat meat. It's just what happens in my life. I could never be vegan. Cheese is part of my life. Pizza is the answer.
You also can't eat a burger. The only meat I really indulge in. Steak is not for me. I used to be able to eat it, but now I'm like. How was I so blood thirsty? How was I so carnivorous and testosterone charged that I thought this was a good idea?
Below are all my beautiful fish recipes that I've wanted to share with you. If you were looking for a recipe on how to make goldfish or Swedish fish, you need to go to a store. I don't understand why your being so difficult. Go to Walmart. Save money. Save time. And buy a family sized box of goldfish. There is no reason to be this difficult.
Rum Salmon
6 Salmon Steaks 1 cup of Rum 1 cup of Brown Sugar ½ cup of Salt 1 tablespoon of Pepper Pour the rum over the salmon steaks and let it marinate for 15 minutes at room temperature, drain and pat dry with paper towels. Set aside. Combine the brown sugar, salt, and pepper. Spread 1/3 in a casserole dish, place the salmon steaks on top, and the remaining brown sugar mixture over the salmon. Cover and marinate in the refrigerator for 4 hours. Grill for 4-6 minutes per side. Shrimp Tacos 2 pounds of uncooked Shrimp 3 cloves of minced Garlic 1/3 cup of Lime Juice 3 tablespoon of Lemon Juice Corn Tortillas 1 teaspoon of Chili Powder 1 teaspoon of Cumin ½ teaspoon of Red Pepper Combine the garlic, lime juice, lemon juice, chili powder, cumin, and red pepper. Marinate the shrimp for 10 minutes, turning once. Grill the shrimp. In the meantime heat or fry your tortillas. Serve with sour cream and salsa.
“Baby Don’t Lie” had reggae influence and a noticeable lack of brash effervescence so common in a Gwen release. Her third studio album was slated for a December 2014 release. I heard “Baby Don’t Lie” twice on the radio and it just missed the top 40 in the United States.
Buy "Baby Don't Lie"
She had a new single to premier at a one off performance. “Used To Love You” was bare and raw. It didn’t quite light up contemporary airwaves, but it was a critical return to form. Gwen was back.
“Make Me Like You” is her newest creation. Light and frothy it hopes to return her to the top 10 or at the very least top 40 of popular music charts. Full of words directed at Blake Shelton its hook laden in it’s simplicity. She knows how a million girls feel when they meet a new boy.
There are mentions of “ovens and beaters and graters”. All practical cooking utensils. Gwen apparently is also like “a chef making donuts and pastries”. You see there are plenty of food filled terminology to compile a list of yummy recipes to explain the inspiration of Gwen Stefani into today’s Tasty Tuesday.
Let’s also not forget about the “sour milk all on the floor” because someone “didn’t shut the refrigerator”. Sour dough pancakes anyone?
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.
Combine the flour and salt. Set aside. Cream the butter and sugar until it is light and fluffy. Add the egg, vanilla extract, and butter extract, mixing well. Add the flour mixture, beating until it is well blended. Put the dough into cookie molds, placing them on a baking sheet, baking for 9-11 minutes, or until the edges are light brown. Turn the cookies onto a wire rack to cool, dusting them with powdered sugar
Inspiration: “ovens and beaters and graters”
Pignoli Biscotti 2 cups of Flour 1 ½ teaspoon of Baking Powder ¼ teaspoon of Salt ½ cup of Butter ¼ cup of Sugar 2 tablespoons of Lemon Juice 2 tablespoons of Lemon Zest Preheat the oven to 325 degrees. Combine the flour, baking, powder, and salt. Set aside. Cream the butter and sugar until it is light and fluffy. Add the lemon juice and the lemon zest, mixing well. Add the flour mixture, beating until it is well blended. Divide the dough in half and shape it into 2 logs about ½ inch thick and 1 ½ inches wide on a lightly greased baking sheet, baking for 25 minutes or until they are light brown. Let cool for 5 minutes then slice them at a 45 degree angle, turn them onto their sides, baking for another 10 minutes. NOTE: These are bland, but excellent when dipped in chocolate.
Inspiration: “a chef making donuts and pastries”
Fruit Tart 1 Egg Yolk 1 tablespoon of Heavy Cream ½ teaspoon of Vanilla Extract 1 ¼ cup of Flour 2/3 cup of Powdered Sugar ¼ teaspoon of Salt 3 Kiwi 1 cup of Raspberries 1 Peach 1 package of Vanilla Pudding ½ cup of Currant Jelly 8 ounces of Butter Whisk together the egg yolk, heavy cream, and vanilla extract. Set aside. Using a food processor, pulse the flour, powdered sugar, and salt. Add the egg mixture and the butter, pulsing until the mixture resembles coarse cornmeal. Press the dough into a tart pan and freeze for 10 minutes. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Bake for 20 minutes or until lightly browned. Spread the pudding over the cooled crust, then place the fruit on it attractively. Brush the currant jelly over it all and refrigerate until ready to serve.
It brought to mind all of my tic tac memories. I have so many. Not a Christmas goes by with a package of tic tacs in my stocking. And, the Easter basket isn't complete if a complete set of pastel colored tic tacs isn't waiting for my inner child.
Now, this is the premise of the tic tac diet. A diet I take part in. In the morning you eat one tic tac. In the afternoon you eat one tic tac. And at night you think about the two tic tacs you will eat tomorrow. It's a very healthy diet. It's great for you. There's a counting cup. RuPaul endorses it. Me (your favorite blogger) endorses it. And, who doesn't love tic tacs.
I knew of someone who used to only eat the outside of the tic tac. The full 1.9 calories was too much. So, they would suck on it until the candy shell dissolved. I personally think this is how pills should be flavored. Someone please still this idea from me and make it happen.
The company that makes tic tacs are God on earth. They make Ferroro Rocher. The pinnacle of chocolate making. Nutella is also manufactured by them. As much as they care about our waistlines, sometimes I think they don't.
RECIPES:
Tic Tac Pie 1 Baked Eight Inch Pie Crust 2 cups of Instant Chocolate Pudding 2 containers of Tic Tacs Full recipe at Is It Safe? (here)
Tic Tac Drink
1 part Orange Rum 1 Part Triple Sec 1 Part Orange Juice 1 Part Red Bull Full Recipe at Drink Nation (here)
Orange Tic Tac
2 ounces of Mandarin Vodka 2 ounces of Red Bull 3/4 ounce of Orange Juice Full recipe at Food (here) |
AboutEverything's a competition when you're raised by the television. SOCIAL MEDIA
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