 | This week I finished my final freshman orientation. It's a wonderful two hours of pretending like you don't hate everyone you meet. It usually involves me pointing to a picture of me with my platinum blonde hair saying, “I'm the one who looks like a nice lesbian.” The last one was particularly awful. None of the incoming freshman are prettier then me, so that's a relief. But, everyone kept complimenting the president of my organization. She looked amazing. The hair. The dress. The make up. But, I was there????????? They were telling her she was pretty, before they even said a word to me. I was the after thought. ME. |
I already felt off balance. That weekend I'd been trying on an XXS crop top and it didn't fit me. They used to. They didn't have an XS, so I had to try on a normal small. I had to go up two sizes. ME.
 | I was telling one girl about my problems and she said to me, “Now you know what it's like for me. People always compliment you first.” And, I said to her, “Yes, but your used to it.” Anyway, I'm really upset. I'm old. I need to lose three pounds and my entire life is falling apart and school isn't even starting for another week. |
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