Jennifer Lopez is not content to stay nestled in the suburban middle class of Kohl's with her new capsule collection for Giuseppe Zanotti. The new collection is expected to launch January, 2017 with two new bags and a few pairs of shoes ranging from $795-$1,995.
A capsule collection to the uninitiated was an idea put forth by Donna Karan. It offers a limited amount of clothing that puts all the focus on “essential” pieces.
The new collaboration is called Giuseppe for Jennifer Lopez. It's touchingly original in name. Jennifer is sure to be in good hands after a pairing up Giuseppe did with Beyonce last year. The as yet unfinished product is roughly described to include wedge sneakers (a personal guilty pleasure), gladiators, and leather handbags.
The new accessories are sure to be tasteful. Jennifer has assured us that they are “bad ass” and they have “sparkle” and as long as their covered in Savorski crystals I certainly won't be complaining.
What I'm really waiting for is the Lifetime Original Movie in which the four dissenting justices are cast as the villains. This was a historic decision and to be on the wrong side of social change is going to be really embarrassing for them. In a few decades we will have people saying that it took to long for this decision to be made.
Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy wrote the majority opinion for this case. I feel like that's a big deal. Honestly, I didn't pay as much attention as I should have in my U.S. Government class. I definitely feel like Kennedy could have gotten it when he was younger. He's 78 now and I feel like in his twenties it would have been good. He went to Harvard and Stanford. So, he's smart. I just feel him.
“Women belong in all places where decisions are being made.”
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
Ruth Bader Ginsburg is bae if we're being perfectly honest. I love her. She went to both Cornwell and Columbia. Stand up for higher education.
The only other male who voted for this was Stephen Breyer. He's Jewish. Has that sexy bald spot going on. Bill Clinton picked him. He's gone to Stanford, Oxford, and Harvard. Someone went hard as fuck in their educational studies and I salute him. Turn up Stephen Breyer.
Elena Kagan is our final Justice. She kills it to. She's also Jewish. I didn't know there was so much Jewish representation at the Supreme Court. Turn the fuck up for that. She was also picked by Obama. She's gone to Harvard and that's the same school Elle Woods went to and in my book that's all that matters.
Let's be really clear about this list. It is simply a review of the albums I have bought this year. I could never numerically list my favorite albums for a year. I could knock some out of the top ten, but let's be honest. I love music too much. Now almost all the music I got this year, I bought the day it came out.
You know I like my CD. That means some albums I may have talked about or have wanted, I do not have. RuPaul never released Born Naked in a physical format, Troye Sivan didn't release TRYXE physically in the United States, and Azealia Banks will be putting Broke With Expensive Taste out in January. It will make next years list.
I'm going to try to be a cold calculated bitch to my faves. Will see how well this goes. I'll give you a general rating out of five bubbles and include the song I played the most individually according to my computer.
1989: Taylor Swift
Who else was shocked at how great this album was. I bought it the moment it came out. The Target staff was still putting it up and I had to reach past them to get it. This album is so much better then “Shake It Off” predicted. I know I said I wouldn't it. Of course I did. I'm so glad, I did. I am now a proud and out Taylor Swift fan. This album is everything.
Most Played Song: Tie between “Welcome To New York” and “Blank Space”
Cheek to Cheek: Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett
I bought it for Lady Gaga. Real talk. That's why the world bought it. This is a jazz album. I tentatively think it was well executed. I don't listen to jazz. When I do listen to this album I jam, but is it going to take the place of ARTPOP? Absolutely not.
Most Played Song: “I Can't Give You Anything But Love”
Buy Cheek to Cheek
This is an album. I don't listen to the songs individually when I listen to Kelis it is the full experience. This is a soul funk R&B album. I love it. It may not be for everyone, but it's an insanely well executed project.
Most Played Song: Tie between “Bless The Telephone” and “Jerk Ribs”
Going to Hell: The Pretty Reckless
4 ½ Bubbles
One of the best albums of the year. Obsessed. I love. Every song is almost perfect. It strays a little too hard rock for me at times, but that's because I'm not usually one of hard rocks biggest proponents. Buy this album. It's fronted by Gossip Girl alumn, Taylor Momsen, and man does she kill it as a provocative Lolita figure.
Most Played Song: Tie between “Heaven Knows”, “Why'd You Bring A Shotgun To The Party”, and “Fucked Up World”
Buy Going To Hell
Motion: Calvin Harris
DJ Calvin Harris has hit his stride. This album is everything you want, radio friendly pop fodder with plenty of bangers. The fantastic Big Sean feature with “Open Wide” or the Tinashe led “Dollar Signs”. He did a great job creating a flowing record. It also doesn't hurt that he back loaded the album with it's best songs. Another collaboration with Ellie Goulding hit home and you should check this album out before these songs hit the top ten.
Most Played Song: Tie between “Pray to God” featuring Haim and “Dollar Signs” featuring Tinashe
Platinum: Miranda Lambert
3 ½ Bubbles
Miranda is my country darling, I love her music. This is a rambling album and it works. It does, but as a rambling album some songs turn me off to the overall aesthetic. “Little Red Wagon” being the biggest put down. And, I read in a review that they consider it a stand out track, so I might just be missing something. There's her trademark humor in tow with “Old Shit” and “Gravity is a Bitch”. I am also not impressed with lead single “Automatic”. It's kind of condescending and it doesn't really sound like Miranda. It also must be known that I am overwhelmed with both “Smokin' and Drinkin'” and “Platinum”. They barely missed being the my most played song.
Most Played Song: “Something Bad” feauturing Carrie Underwood
Queen of the Clouds: Tove Lo
Another album I want to get into. I didn't it. It didn't click for me. “Like Em Young” did resonate with me. I just want to send this song to my crush anonymously and say how does this make you feel. The concept of splitting the album into three distinct parts of “The Sex”, “The Love” and “The Pain”. That was really cool. I know someone who loves this album. Give it a shot. I'm going to keep trying. Tove Lo as a pop star intrigues me.
Most Played Song: “Not On Drugs”
That's Christmas to Me: Pentatonix
People went gaga for this acapella Christmas album this year. I bought it because of Mitch and Scott. It's acceptable Christmas fair. It does not compete with Celine Dion or Bette Midler. If you want it I say go get it.
Most Played Song: “Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy”
Sound of a Woman: Kiesza
3 ½ Bubbles
Solid and unique debut by dance singer Kiesza. This is artistic dance music in the highest regard. It doesn't hit home for me quite hard enough and some of the more R&B inspired tracks leave me bored. However, I like her and would look into her next album. If you didn't hear her almost hit “Hideaway” that's something you should get on.
Most Played Song: “Hideaway”
Buy Sound of a Woman
Super Critical: The Ting Tings
4 ½ Bubbles
The Ting Tings are one of the winners this year in music. True they are my favorite band, but this album got to me. First listen I was set on three bubbles. A few more spins later and this new disco sound was everything I wanted from The Tings. It's light fun filled and some of the tracks I initially questioned, I am now in love with. The only two that haven't quite clicked are “Wabi Sabi” and “Green Poison”, but I still like them. Of the two singles released so far, I believe “Do It Again” is the best.
Most Played Song: “Failure”
Buy Super Critical
Volume 3: Pentatonix
3 ½ Bubbles
3rd EP from acapella group Pentatonix it includes covers of some of the years most popular songs. When you play a game like that it comes down to whether you like the original version better or not. They usually hold there own when it comes to the covers. It's the original song “Papaoutai” that features violinist Lindsey Stirling that disappoints me the most. I had so much hopes, because it's Lindsey Stirling and it did not come through.
Most Played Song: “See Through”
Buy Volume 3
Ultraviolence: Lana Del Rey
4 ½ Bubbles
Moody songstress Lana Del Rey came out with her second album the same day as Jennifer Lopez. I like this album better. Maybe not at first, but it's sunk into my soul. Every song is a masterpiece. I've played each individually and I don't know what keeps it from being a five bubble experience for me. Lana Del Rey knew what she wanted for this album and she delivered. I would recommend it to anyone. My mother and Boomer both claimed that they preferred Born to Die better. I told them to never talk to me again.
Most Played Song: “Ultraviolence”
The Voyager: Jenny Lewis
4 ½ Bubbles
Adore would be too light of a word for how I feel about Jenny Lewis. If you want to know what emotional state I was in for a better part of 2014, you can listen to this album. It's soft, modern rock. It's easy listening. The only reason it's not a straight five bubbles is that one of the final songs “Aloha & The Three Johns” just didn't quite sit well with me. If I was to tell you an album you need to buy this year, it would be this one. Both Cosmopolitan and Billboard included this album on their year end lists.
Most Played Song: “She's Not Me”
Buy The Voyager
Favorite Album of the Year: Tie between Going to Hell by the Pretty Reckless, Super Critical by The Ting Tings, Ultraviolence by Lana Del Rey, and The Voyager by Jenny Lewis.
Favorite Song of the Year: “Failure” by The Ting Tings
I actually started watching it, because of Tumblr. I just said this looks like my show. Hot boys and hot girls. What could possibly go wrong.
The four male leads are just take me now kind of hot. Tyler Posey is the main one. And, he is definitely attractive, but really it's his eyes. He has dimples and cute brown eyes. I'm just like slay me. He's just really cute.
Then, there is Colton Haynes. He is straight sex. I try to like his character, because he is so attractive. I just watch the show and I want him to take my body. Then, he opens his mouth and I'm not here for it. I was actually really feeling him towards the end of season 1, then he messed it up. Now, I'm trying to like him, so I can shamelessly be obsessed with him. If you follow me on tumblr you probably now how obsessed I am. Like all my tumblr was pictures of him for a minute there.
At the top of the food chain is Tyler Hoechlin. Now he is attractive, but he's such a father figure to me. He's kind of like a DILF. Which, I might add is the creepiest thing. Who started this as a thing. No. We should not want to have sex with people who we think of as our fathers. Just stop.
The women are just as cute. Crystal Reed and Holland Roden are everything to me. Their friendship is weird. I don't get it, but I like it. One of them plays the whore and I'm here for it. I just love Holland Roden as Lydia. Lydia is one of my favorite characters, although I did not start out liking her. Crystal Reed's character is the main love interest, but the thing is I just don't care about her love with Tyler Posey.
This show is kind of like Orange is the New Black in that sense. No one really cares about the problems of the two main characters. It's kind of like, shut up about it already. I want them to move on.
The plot itself is basic. It kind of scares me. That's so embarrassing, but I cover my eyes when I watch this show sometimes. I'm not good at handling that kind of stress.
There are also a lot of wholes in the plot. In the first season this one character kept dying. There is blood coming from his mouth. He has to be dead. Next episode. No explanation, no one acts like it's weird that he is among the living.
Or the other time he gets shot multiple times with a bow and arrow, then shot in the heart with a gun. He is dead. The two killers are not even bothering with him. Then, the big bad werewolf comes along, and this character miraculously is able to take him down. Like how did he go from dead to I'm in perfect condition to beat up my stronger opponent.
Writers. Think through your life choices. I'm going to have to start reading fan fiction to explain all the gaping holes. That being said. It is actually enjoyable. It has substance. Unlike Kingdom, I really do like watching it.
If you judge me for watching it, I feel you, I understand. But, to be honest I'm not really watching it for the plot. And, I'm okay with that.
I see a lot of good plot.
Happy Halloween, everyone. I hope you are doing something real exciting. I was supposed to be going to a murder mystery party today. Instead I am at work. We were not allowed to ask off from work, and I was like please god. He did not answer. Hopefully it is not busy. We shall see.
Now some of you may be hosting a party tonight, just looking for some good music to put on in order to be festive. That is what I am here to do. I love all of these songs. With any luck these should be the creepy that you did not think of to add to your Halloween play list. I will not insult your intelligence. I'm sure you got the cornerstones: “Thriller”, “Disturbia”, “This Is Halloween”.
Buy "Voodoo Doll"
“I'm In It” may not exemplify Halloween, but Kanye West throws in enough robotic screams to make it a terrifying pop/rap experience on his last album Yeezus.
Buy "I'm In It"
Of course Lady Gaga found her way into Halloween. With more then one song to choose from, I settled on “Bloody Mary” and “Monster” as exemplary Halloween lore.
Buy "Bloody Mary"
Buy "Gang Bang"
Buy "Going To Hell"
We all know Rihanna's major smash “Disturbia” and scene stealing “Russian Roulette”, but what about the opener to album Rated-R, “Mad House”? Under two minutes long. There's no reason not to let her open up your Halloween bash.
Buy "Mad House"
Silly Christian band The W's is my final suggestion with their song “The Devil is Bad”. Between all the zombies, bloody mary's, drownings, and debauchery of the night it might be good to remember that the devil is bad.
I have owned this album for a good bit of time now. Actually, I bought the day of Boomer's going away party. That was what, the first Thursday of August? The second. Needless to say it's been a bit of a while.
And, I liked it when I bought it, but I'm obsessed now. I've been listening to it every day. It's everything. Jenny Lewis is everything.
Actually it's not a bad movie. I have made so many people watch this movie. I still laugh. I still cry. I still love it. The basic premise is that Shelly Long is the recently separated mother of daughter Hannah Nefler (played by Jenny Lewis) and she takes over as the leader of her girl scout troop. But, instead of teaching them the ways of the wilds, she teaches them how to survive the wilds of Beverly Hills. And, of course there's Velda Plendor, who wants to get Phyllis Nefler out of the girl scouts. And toss her out on her butt.
It's funny. See it. Watch it. Enjoy it. Cringe, maybe. Just don't watch it with me, I can quote the whole movie. Needless to say I was watching my childhood favorite two years ago. And, I said to myself what has happened to everyone in this movie. Thanks to the power of wikipedia I soon found out about Jenny Lewis's singing career.
Before her solo career. She worked with this band, Rilo Kiley, now I have not investigated them. Jenny is no longer with them and I'm really just not that interested at this point. You see I would have bought Jenny Lewis's records two years ago, but I wasn't working. I subsisted on twenty dollars a month. So, you have to pick your priorities. That is Madonna, Rihanna, Nicki Minaj, P!NK, Jennifer Lopez, Lana Del Rey, Gossip. And, the admittedly questionable purchase of Carly Rae Jepsen's debut album Kiss. Which, is not as bad as you think.
One problem with the car, though, is that you can't see around anything. ANYTHING. I'm just used to be high off the ground able to see around cars. Mind you, I don't have one of those redneck, high rollers, southern boys are so found of. It's a mid size, comfortable little truck. It's also never clean.
I love how I forgot to tell you the name of the album. It's called The Voyager and I love the album cover. You can see it right there. I don't how to describe it musically. Light rock. No, that's not right. Everything is indie-rock now. Its very soothing. I like it.
This album is an experience, like ARTPOP or the 1975's debut set. It's amazing. What took me so long to just become obsessed is that it doesn't hit you in the face. This is not Katy Perry going for the jugular. This is an alt rock artist who knows she's not going to have a hit and that's okay with her. You have to connect with the words. And, I have finally done that.
There is quite a bit of drug references. It does tend to surprise you. I am still piecing together what these songs mean. “Just One of The Guys” has yet to hit me. There's one line where she says “I'm just another lady without a baby”, and I'm trying to figure out how that relates to it.
“Late Bloomer” I have worked out. It is about a young inexperienced girl who moves to the big city and proceeds to get involved with drugs. Beautiful, story there Jenny.
That's one thing I've noticed I feel comfortable calling her Jenny. Like, if I ran into the streets and saw Beyonce. I would not say Beyonce. I would say “Hey, Mrs. Carter”. I think Jenny and I are friends. We have to be. I feel connected.
Speaking of friends. Anne Hathway is even slick more obsessed with Jenny then I am. She appeared in the music video for “Just One of the Guys” alongside Kristen Stewart. It's basically everything. And to prove that Jenny Lewis is basically the most adorable human being on the planet and you most certainly should go out and buy The Voyager look at her response to being asked who the most attractive male is.
If you don't want to buy The Voyager and you still need more convincing other then the fact that your favorite blogger has given you their full out recommendation. Here are my favorite tracks from the album you should check out:
Buy "She's Not Me"
Buy "The Voyager" (Song Only)
Buy "The New You"
I had no intentions of writing this article. It was not part of my weekend. And, then I went out with Rosencrantz. We once again went on the game plan of let's just go out and do something. We ended up at a shopping mall. Where we looked rather then shopped.
We had one goal to find a candle that represented the fall season. We found none. We went in two different shops and each time could not find what Rosencrantz wanted. After this the movie Gone Girl just happens to come up. Now I had planned on going to see it with my mother. I have decided to set myself on a budget as I have been spending rather recklessly as of late. And, there's nothing better then having your mother pay for it.
Before we actually saw the movie. We stopped at Target, where I was stopped. I was recognized. They said are you one of Miss Sara Bellum and the Mayor's friends. I said of course. They knew me from me being all over their instagram account. It may just be local stardom, but stardom I do have.
After I actually got home. My mother wants to go out. And she decides we are going to go see No Good Deed. I saw two movies in under five hours. It was rather insane.
I suppose his penis had a nice shape. We're just going to have to buy the movie and freeze frame for a better angle if we're really that curious. I don't really know what to tell you about this movie. It is a thriller. I just don't want to give anything away. The basic premise is that Ben Affleck's wife has disappeared, and it is up to you decide whether or not he actually killed her.
You have to remember that this review is coming from someone who read the book. That I knew the screenplay was written by the author. I had very specific expectations for this film and they were not met. The author said the film would differ from the book. It did not. There were deviations, but nothing jaw dropping. Some of the same uncomfortable dialogue from the book found its way into the movie. Thank you Gillian Flynn.
I did enjoy the movie. You should see it. There are some graphic scenes, sexually, physically, and verbally, so beware of that. This movie is not Academy Award material. If you don't see it. You are not missing anything. I would give it 3 ½ Bubbles personally.
Now, I asked Rosencrantz -someone who had not read the book- to give me her opinion of the movie, and her rating was slightly better. It was 4 Bubbles. I definitely think if you read the book you should see the movie.
With my mother I got around to seeing No Good Deed. I love this movie. It stars Idris Elba as deranged psychopath killer and Taraji P. Henson as docile housewife. I am truly terrified of Idris Elba now. If I saw him walking down the street, I would be like bye bitch.
He does a great job. This movie is horrifying. I do not get freaked out by a lot of horror movies, because I can seperate them from my life. But, a man in distress comes knocking on your door and proceeds to terrorize your family. That I can relate to. It makes me not want to answer my door.
So, I have read that this movie did not receive good reviews. I'm not sure why. I love it. It is one of those movies I will never want to see again (Think Fatal Attraction), but I think its fantastic. Maybe I was just in the mood for this kind of movie, but I am obsessed. I like it. Taraji P. Henson slayed and that little narrative twist at the end. Yes. That is some Agatha Christie shit.
Make a point of seeing it. I gave it 4 Bubbles. I did not ask my mother her opinion, because she does not know that I blog. So, whenever she does find out about this. That should be interesting.
End point. Go see a movie.
What's the point of dating if they don't go with your outfit?