Metallic Exotic Cornrows

I hope Brooke Candy enjoys that title. I tried hard to make it original. This should be an interesting Snapshot Saturday. Brooke Candy is trying hard core to out Gaga-Gaga and she's not doing a bad job at it. Be forewarned that there is a picture at the end of this article that is graphic. It's nothing you haven't seen before. I think it's incredibly amusing in this dominatrix kind of way, so I included it. If you don't feel the same way. Je suis desolee. I warned you.

Brooke Candy is an exotic dancer and rapper. Isn't that perfect. If I ever become famous I want to be an exotic dancer. It's such a sophisticated way of saying you do sexual things for money. I am here for it.

I found out about her a few months ago when a Gaga obsessed friend told me to watch “Opulence”. I've included the video. It scares me. But, I was interested. I did a little digging into her musical career. I listened to almost everything on the Opulence EP, but I'm holding out for the full length album due out this year. But, with the lack of success “Opulence” had we'll see if that happens. 

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You might have noticed how irreverent how Brooke Candy is. It shouldn't surprise you then that one of her songs is “I Wanna Fuck Right Now”. It shares a strong resemblance to the Black Eyed Peas song “Rock That Body” in which one of the refrains is “I Wanna Rock Right Now”.

Personally, I don't know how I feel about Brooke, yet. I'm intrigued, and also very put off by her. She's also an actress by the way. Not the Dita Von Teese dildo porn shoes kind of actress, but instead appearing in quality cinema like Bloodrape. And, we thought Machette Kills was bad.

You can't ignore all the culture appropriation going on. I'm surprised 

more people have not gone the fuck off on her. But, that's okay. This is who Brooke Candy is. It's a very accept it or move on kind of attitude. My ambivalence to her public persona is strong.

Buy "Opulence"

The only thing really putting me off about her is the name of her 'fans'. I am sick of every single celebrity coming up with a name for their fanbase. Stop. Just stop. Honestly, the Lovatics? I don't think so Demi.

Only real celebrities deserve fan bases and that's only if it works. There should not be any forcing of fanbase names. Little Monsters. Yes. Here for it.

Beyhive?

Queen. YASSSSS. Here for it.

Jlovers. WTF? No, J. Lo no. And this is coming from someone who fits under the category of Jlovers. I refuse. You can back your way back up to the Bronx. Team Duff? Sorry, Hilary, you're bae, I love you, but no. I don't like it. STOP.

And, Brooke. Fagmob? I see it now everyone in the world buying shirts with the word 'fagmob' slashed across it. Hell no. Jlover, I can accept. Team Duff, it's really not that bad. But, fagmob? That's offensive and rude. And, I don't think you mean it that way, but 'fag' is not a word I want thrown in this world. This is not some Yankee Doodle Dandy shit. Fix it.

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SIDE NOTE: The main chorus of the song "Opulence" is a direct reference to the classic documentary Paris is Burning which you should get around to seeing if you have the time.